Adult — a classification, not a measurement. An on-box language model (Qwen3.6-35B-A3B-UD-Q6_K_XL, prompt version 1) read this channel’s own recent posts on 10 August 2026 and assigned it the closest of 31 fixed categories, at 92% confidence. This is a model’s judgement about what the channel is likely to be about, not a fact this register measured the way a subscriber count or a view count is measured — it can be revised on a later pass, and it carries no weight anywhere else on this page. How this classification works, and why it has no browse page of its own yet.
Observations
These are measurements, not verdicts. Each one below states something we counted, alongside the evidence it was counted from, so you can check it rather than take it. None of them is graded: every observation this register holds is recorded at severity 0, because the precision of the detectors behind them has not been measured yet, and a rating we cannot support is worse than none. Read each as a fact about the data, not as a judgement about the channel. How we measure.
Content that also appears on other registered channels
Posts published here appear word for word on 1 other registered channel. The matching is on the text itself, not on Telegram’s forward marker, so it finds a copy whether or not it was labelled as one.
Matching posts — open both and compare (6 of the pairs behind the counts below)
Text overlap is the Jaccard coefficient over the set of distinct three-word phrases in the two bodies: 1.00 is identical wording, and the threshold for counting a pair at all is 0.70. Candidates are generated by simhash LSH (4 x 16-bit bands, exact Hamming <= 3) verified against the bodies with Jaccard over the SET of distinct 3-word shingles. Published first counts which side of each matching pair carries the earlier timestamp — in this corpus, which is the limitation directly below.
What this cannot establish
MEASURED, DOMINANT ERROR SOURCE: a post ingested before 2026-08-06 may have carried a forward header that was not recorded. A 45-pair hand-check against live t.me pages found 14 (31%) where the live page shows a forward header naming the other channel and the database has none, plus 4 more (9%) naming a third party. The text match itself was wrong 0 times out of 45. Read attribution_capture.items_in_trusted_window before treating the unattributed count as a claim.
Telegram lets a channel forward a post with a header naming the source, and we only began reliably recording that header on 2026-08-06. 7 of the 7 matches recorded here fall after that date and carried no header when we read them. The rest predate reliable capture and are not evidence either way.
“Published first” means first in this corpus. We hold 32 comparable posts for this entry, running 3 August 2026 to 7 August 2026. A channel we have read one page deep will look younger than a neighbour we have read in full, and the order would flip with no change in the underlying facts.
The detector’s own notes on this observation, as it recorded them. Names in this_style are fields of the underlying evidence record, which the plain-English paragraphs above read out for this entry.
Verbatim republication has three causes and the text separates only two: a clone/mirror, unattributed copy-paste, or BOTH channels copying a common third source that neither attributes. The spread filter (content held by at most 8 channels) reduces the third and does not remove it.
'Earliest' means earliest IN THIS CORPUS. A channel ingested one page deep will look younger than a neighbour ingested in full; corpus_coverage above is there to be checked before the direction is believed.
shared_verified_est extrapolates the sampled pass rate over the full narrow match count; sampled/passed are the numbers actually measured.
Absence of a forward header is not proof of intent: Telegram lets a channel disable forward attribution, and a credit written in the body is not parsed as attribution here (mention_edge_either_way above is the closest available signal).
Across the whole group of 2, the earliest publisher we hold is @cringeestory — which is this entry. That is a statement about our reading window, not a claim of authorship.
Recorded under the key clone_mutual, last confirmed 8 August 2026. An observation that a later pass no longer finds is cleared, and a cleared observation is removed from this page rather than being shown struck through — we do not keep publishing a claim we have withdrawn. Dispute an observation.
Also posting the same content
This channel’s posts match, word for word or near enough, posts on 1 other registered channel, found by comparing text fingerprints across every channel on the register. That matching has been checked by hand against the live Telegram pages and found reliable — 0 wrong of 45 pairs re-read.
Which channel, if either, published first is deliberately not shown. The same hand-check found that reading wrong 18 of 45 times — 60%, no better than a coin flip — because it depends on how deep our own crawl happened to reach into each channel’s history, not on when the content was actually first posted. This list is ordered by subscriber count, the same as every other listing on this site, never by which channel we think came first. Word-for-word matching has several ordinary explanations besides copying — a channel mirroring itself, an unattributed repost, or two channels independently repeating the same wire story — and this measurement cannot tell those apart. How this is measured.
7 measurements spanning 6 days, net -140. Dots are measurements; the straight line between them is drawn to join them, not to claim we know the path taken in between — snapshots are recorded only when a count changes, so gaps mean “no change observed”, never “interpolated”. The vertical axis spans 43,361–43,543 and does not start at zero.
Measurement log — every subscribers count we have recorded
Measured (UTC)
Subscribers
Change
12 Aug 2026, 06:12
43,382
-23
11 Aug 2026, 04:26
43,405
-19
10 Aug 2026, 06:45
43,424
-28
9 Aug 2026, 03:53
43,452
-28
8 Aug 2026, 07:13
43,480
-26
7 Aug 2026, 04:23
43,506
-16
6 Aug 2026, 09:47
43,522
first reading
Engagement
74 posts held, back to 3 August 2026 — the reader has not yet reached the start of this channel’s public history, so older posts may sit further back, unread. Read across 18 pagesof Telegram’s post history, 20 posts per page.
ERR · 30 days
2.59%
avg views ÷ 43,382 subscribers
Avg views / post
1,120
74 posts measured
Reaction rate
2.42%
reactions ÷ views · ER floor
Posts in window
74
of 74 held
ERR is average views per post over the last 30 days divided by subscribers, the definition TGStat uses, so this figure is comparable with the one you will see elsewhere. It falls structurally as a channel grows: a high ERR on a small channel and a low one on a large channel describe reach mathematics, not quality. We publish the figure and the sample it came from and pass no verdict on it.
ER is defined industry-wide as (forwards + reactions + comments) ÷ views— note the denominator is views, not subscribers. Telegram’s public web preview carries views and reactions but not forward or comment counts, so the reaction rate above is the reactions term only and is therefore a floor: the true ER for this channel is higher by an amount we have not measured and will not estimate. It is computed over the 73 of 74 measured posts that carry a reaction reading, and over those same posts' views.
What these figures were computed from
Window
Rolling 30 days · latest post in window 12 August 2026
Posts held
74 (3 August 2026 – 12 August 2026)
Views total
83,123
Reactions total
2,000
Forwards / comments
not exposed by the public surface — not measured, not estimated
Readings taken
12 Aug 2026, 21:27 UTC
Views are a single reading per post, taken at the time above. A post published in the last day or two is still accumulating views, which pulls the 30-day average down slightly. That is a property of the standard definition rather than a fault in it, so we keep the definition rather than “correcting” the number into something nobody can reproduce.
Precision. Telegram publishes view counts on its public widget in short form — 8.12K, 3.7M — so any reading at or above 1,000 reaches us rounded to three significant figures, and only counts below 1,000 are exact. Averages and rates derived from them are shown to the same precision rather than to the unit: a figure like 3,701,250 would assert digits nobody measured.
Reaction counts are published per emoji and rounded the same way, so a total below 1,000 is exact and a larger one is a sum that may carry a rounded component from each emoji above 1,000. Because it is a sum, it does not look rounded — read a large reaction total as three significant figures per contributing emoji rather than as the figure it prints.
What this channel posts
Photos
73
Videos
4
Links
136
Lifetime counters from Telegram’s own channel header, read 12 August 2026 — not the date at the top of this page, which is when the subscriber count was last read. Below Telegram’s rounding threshold, so these counts are exact.
Reaction mix
2,000 reactions across 72 posts, in 6 distinct kinds. The most used accounts for 38.7% of them.
Every reaction kind recorded on the sample, most used first
Reaction
Count
Share
Share, drawn
❤
774
38.7%
🤯
515
25.8%
😁
414
20.7%
🔥
192
9.60%
👍
81
4.05%
🥰
24
1.20%
No sentiment is inferred, and none should be read in. This table is ordered by count and by nothing else. Emoji do not carry stable meaning across languages or communities — 🙏 is thanks in one channel and mourning in another — so we publish which ones were pressed and how often, and pass no judgement on what an audience meant by them.
Precision. Telegram publishes reaction counts per emoji and short-forms each one — 4.34K, 1.2M — so any single kind at or above 1,000 reaches us at three significant figures, and only counts below 1,000 are exact. The shares above are ratios of those figures and carry the same error. This is also why the total here can differ slightly from a reaction total printed elsewhere on the page: both are sums of the same rounded parts, taken over samples with different edges.
Coverage. Reactions were read on 73 of the 74 sampled posts in this sample. Summed by Telegram’s own count on each post — not by adding up the per-emoji breakdown above — those same posts carry 2,000reactions in total: the kind of figure the paragraph above means by “a reaction total printed elsewhere on the page”.
Measured over the 74 most recent posts we hold, published 3 August 2026 to 12 August 2026, using the newest reading held for each. Telegram Stars are excluded: they are a payment, not a reaction, and they have their own section.
Я приготовил член и засунул в стеклянную бутылку. Минуты через 2 он встал. Потом в дверь позвонила бабушка, а я не мог вытащить свой хер из бутылки. Я побежал на кухню за подсолнечный маслом. Итог: бабушка меня спалила за вытаскиванием члена из бутылки, как итог, бутылку потом разбить пришлось, хорошо хоть залупа не пострадала
Д16. Работаю расклейщиком объявлений. Зашла в подъезд клеить, выскочила какая-то бабка и сразу орёт, толкает: «Я сейчас ментов вызову!»
Итог: сижу в отделении со сломанными пальцами, а она ноет, что я её избила.
Воронеж на связи.
На выпускном вечере после шкалки дали в рот одной неплохой шлюшке с нашего класса. Она такая пьяненькая была но видно было, что не против ну и как-то так получилось. Суть в том, что мой друг с ней продолжил мутить, выкладывает сторис с поцелуйчиками с ней)) блять он рядом стоял, когда я ей кончал в рот...
Д21. Я встречаюсь со взрослым мужчиной, который совсем недавно был моим преподом. Секс у нас разный - от грубого до очень нежного. Мы можем часами разговаривать на любые темы, ржать до слёз и спокойно ходить голые по квартире.
Но я до сих пор не могу перейти с ним на «ты». Его это бесит, я сама пыталась, но язык просто не поворачивается.
В итоге живём вот так:
"А Вы сегодня меня трахнуть не желаете?"
"Вы случайно мин…
Д21. У меня был только один постоянный партнёр, встречались три года. После расставания через какое-то время из-за своей наивности отсосала другому парню - он наплел про любовь, а потом просто слился.
После этого случая решила больше не давать раньше времени. И что? Опять познакомилась с новым, и снова всё закончилось отсосом и остальным. Писец... ну я просто очень не люблю отказывать людям. Осуждайте, если хотите😢
Я девственница в свои 23 года. Каждый раз, когда думаю, что когда-нибудь придется в этом признаться, представляю, как парень офигеет.
Общество всё перевернуло: то, что ты ещё ни с кем не была близка, теперь вызывает скорее стыд, чем уважение. А раньше это считалось нормальным - сделать всё правильно, после свадьбы.
Интересно мнение парней: какая была бы ваша реакция на девушку за 20 без опыта?
П19. Устроился на свою первую работу и дрочу там каждый день в туалете. Застукала блять начальница... думал пиздец, уволят, а она предложила ее пёхать, сказала, что увидела твой прибор и ошалела, грех такому пропадать (вроде обычный член). Блять, так-то норм, не жирная, но ей под 50 лет - старше моей матери!
Есть знакомый, с которым давно разошлись из-за его образа жизни. Недавно снова пообщались, и он рассказал, что теперь с компанией по ночам избивает бездомных. Нападают толпой и метелят серьезно - в местных пабликах даже появлялись фото пострадавших с разбитыми лицами.
Знакомый считает бомжей "биомусором" и "раковой опухолью общества". Вот думаю: слить переписку полиции или не лезть?
П18. Купил возбудитель месяц назад, чтобы подсыпать другу в чай, хотел увидеть его реакцию. Но в итоге забыл про эти таблетки, и мама нашла эти таблетки у меня в шкафу. Сейчас мама думает что я импотент. В плане секса у меня все хорошо. Но когда я у мамы спрашиваю деньги, а она говорит: тебе зачем? На эти твои таблетки?
Д23. Я девушка с ребёнком... И работаю почти круглыми сутками что бы как то прожить... И только ради этого пошла работать в эскорт услуги. И теперь живём мы с ним в достатке, он у меня ни в чём не нуждается, но мне стыдно смотреть в глаза ребенку, пускай он и маленький...
Короч жил я этим летом месяц у старшего троюродного брата (считай как родной), а он в то время жил у деда. В общем жили мы оба у деда. Как-то ночью лежим мы дрочим (ничего не подумайте). У брата случился сушняк и он пошёл попить на кухню. Я решил поугарать и встал по среди комнаты со стояком... хотел когда он вернётся встретить его фразой «Welcome to the club, buddy». В итоге заходит дед..
🔥18🤯5❤1
Showing the 12 most recent of 74 posts we hold for @cringeestory. View and reaction counts are the latest single reading for each post, not a live figure, and a recent post is still accumulating both. A view count marked ≈ was rounded by Telegram before we ever saw it — t.me prints views in full below 1,000 and to three significant figures above, so ≈1,200,000 means somewhere between 1,150,000 and 1,249,999. Unmarked counts are exact. Text is reproduced from the public post preview and truncated for length.
Mentions
Names
Channels on the register whose handles appear in this channel's posts.
A mention is a weaker signal than a forward and is counted separately for that reason — naming a channel is not republishing it, and a handle in a post body is easy to place deliberately. The post counts beside each row below are distinct posts in which the handle appeared, from posts we have read on both sides — the “Named by N registered channels” figure above is a different count, of distinct NAMING CHANNELS rather than posts, and is not the sum of the rows under it.
Cite this entry
A live page changes as we take new readings, so a citation should name the measurement it is based on, not just the URL. The line below cites the subscriber count as measured 12 August 2026 — this
entry's latest reading, not the date you are reading this.
“кринж” (@cringeestory), 43,382 subscribers as measured 12 August 2026. Telegram Register, tgregister.com/channel/cringeestory.
Full measurement history, CC BY 4.0. Every reading this register holds for this entry, not just the latest one, as a dated, downloadable record: CSV · JSON. Free to use with attribution to tgregister.com. Each file carries its own generation timestamp, which is the figure to cite for exactly when the data was retrieved.