I act like I don't care. Like nothing can hurt me. I put up this big wall of toughness and pretend everything is fine. Like I don't need somebody's "affection" but in reality I think I am just too scared. Scared of not being good enough. Or of getting hurt. Scared of letting someone in. Maybe even afraid. Afraid of the possibility of being loved by someone who will eventually let me down. Afraid that my heart will โฆ

Channel
๐๐๐ธฦโฯฯฯัััั โก๐ท๐ฆข
@Ox_flora
On this record: Topic ยท Growth ยท Engagement ยท What this channel posts ยท Reactions ยท Posts ยท Cite this entry
71subscribers
-5 since we began measuring on 7 August 2026
Risers and fallers across the register ยท movement among entries of Under 1,000.
Register entry
| Telegram ID | -1002790045585 |
|---|---|
| Type | Channel |
| Username | @Ox_flora |
| Created | Between 1 June 2025 and 30 September 2025 โ estimated from Telegramโs id allocation, not measured. How this range is calculated. |
| First recorded | 9 August 2026 |
| Last confirmed live | 3 October 2026 |
| Measurements held | 5 |
| Confirmed unchanged | 3 times, most recently 3 October 2026 |
| On Telegram | t.me/Ox_flora |
Topic
Personal blog โ a classification, not a measurement. An on-box language model (Qwen3.6-35B-A3B-FP8, prompt version 1) read this channelโs own recent posts on 28 September 2026 and assigned it the closest of 31 fixed categories, at 97% confidence. This is a modelโs judgement about what the channel is likely to be about, not a fact this register measured the way a subscriber count or a view count is measured โ it can be revised on a later pass, and it carries no weight anywhere else on this page. How this classification works, and why it has no browse page of its own yet.
Growth
| Measured (UTC) | Subscribers | Change |
|---|---|---|
| 9 Sept 2026, 20:17 | 71 | -2 |
| 22 Aug 2026, 13:23 | 73 | -2 |
| 15 Aug 2026, 17:14 | 75 | -1 |
| 9 Aug 2026, 21:01 | 76 | no change |
| 7 Aug 2026, 19:39 | 76 | first reading |
Engagement
20 posts held, back to 9 November 2025 โ the reader has not yet reached the start of this channelโs public history, so older posts may sit further back, unread. Read across 1 page of Telegramโs post history, 20 posts per page.
Nothing published in the last 30 days. ERR and ER are rolling 30-day measures, so there is nothing to compute โ we hold 20 posts for this entry, the most recent from 29 July 2026. An engagement rate over an empty window would be a number about nothing.
What this channel posts
- Video runtime
- 22s
- Average length
- 11s
Measured directly from 2 videos with a duration reading, out of the posts we hold for this channel โ not this channelโs whole posting history, only the sample this register has actually read. An exact reading to the second, taken from the post itself rather than from Telegramโs own rounded chrome, so it carries no โ mark.
Reaction mix
52 reactions across 12 posts, in 18 distinct kinds. The most used accounts for 13.5% of them.
| Reaction | Count | Share | Share, drawn |
|---|---|---|---|
| โคโ๐ฅ | 7 | 13.5% | |
| ๐ | 7 | 13.5% | |
| โค | 6 | 11.5% | |
| ๐ | 5 | 9.62% | |
| ๐ญ | 5 | 9.62% | |
| ๐ณ | 3 | 5.77% | |
| โ | 2 | 3.85% | |
| ๐ | 2 | 3.85% | |
| ๐พ | 2 | 3.85% | |
| ๐ | 2 | 3.85% | |
| ๐ | 2 | 3.85% | |
| ๐ข | 2 | 3.85% | |
| ๐ฅฐ | 2 | 3.85% | |
| ๐ | 1 | 1.92% | |
| ๐ป | 1 | 1.92% | |
| ๐ | 1 | 1.92% | |
| ๐ฅ | 1 | 1.92% | |
| ๐ | 1 | 1.92% |
No sentiment is inferred, and none should be read in. This table is ordered by count and by nothing else. Emoji do not carry stable meaning across languages or communities โ ๐ is thanks in one channel and mourning in another โ so we publish which ones were pressed and how often, and pass no judgement on what an audience meant by them.
Precision. Telegram publishes reaction counts per emoji and short-forms each one โ 4.34K, 1.2M โ so any single kind at or above 1,000 reaches us at three significant figures, and only counts below 1,000 are exact. The shares above are ratios of those figures and carry the same error. This is also why the total here can differ slightly from a reaction total printed elsewhere on the page: both are sums of the same rounded parts, taken over samples with different edges.
Coverage. Reactions were read on 12 of the 20 sampled posts in this sample. Summed by Telegramโs own count on each post โ not by adding up the per-emoji breakdown above โ those same posts carry 52 reactions in total: the kind of figure the paragraph above means by โa reaction total printed elsewhere on the pageโ.
Measured over the 20 most recent posts we hold, published 9 November 2025 to 29 July 2026, using the newest reading held for each. Telegram Stars are excluded: they are a payment, not a reaction, and they have their own section.
Recent posts
Sticker, posted without a caption
Because at the end of the day you're the person I want to come home to. You're the person I want to tell how my day went. You're the person I want to share my happiness, sadness, frustration, and success with.
There's a strange kind of loneliness that settles in when you're surrounded by people, yet feel completely alone. You talk, you laugh, you nod at the right moments, but deep inside, it feels like no one truly sees you. You're present, but not connected. It's as if you're floating slightly outside of every conversation, watching yourself participate without ever really belonging. You wonder what it's called that feeliโฆ
Sometimes u can't let go off what's making u sad , cuz it was the only thing that made u happy
๐๐๐ธฦโฯฯฯัััั โก๐ท๐ฆข pinned ยซWhy does it feel like Iโm the dumbest person aliveโฆ like I just canโt read people at all? I canโt even tell whoโs actually my friend and whoโs just pretending. Like are they being real with meโฆ or just lying to my face? Do they actually care about meโฆ or wasโฆยป
Nd at the last we just ACCEPT
Why does it feel like Iโm the dumbest person aliveโฆ like I just canโt read people at all? I canโt even tell whoโs actually my friend and whoโs just pretending. Like are they being real with meโฆ or just lying to my face? Do they actually care about meโฆ or was I just someone they could use whenever they needed? And the thing that hurts the most isโI do realize everythingโฆ but always too late. Why does it never click inโฆ
Thereโs a kind of goodbye that never gets spoken, never written, never even acknowledged. It lingers in the spaces where words should have been. Thatโs the one I chose for you. No blame placed on your shoulders, no questions left behindโjust me, accepting everything, and stepping away so softly that it feels like I was never there at all.
๐ข1
i just wanna hug someone and just cry ๐ญ man....just let all my frustration out.
๐2๐ญ2โคโ๐ฅ1๐1๐ข1
Nd where is the one who's is mine ๐ญ
๐1๐1๐1
Sticker, posted without a caption
โ1๐ณ1๐ฅ1
Showing the 12 most recent of 20 posts we hold for @Ox_flora. View and reaction counts are the latest single reading for each post, not a live figure, and a recent post is still accumulating both. A view count marked โ was rounded by Telegram before we ever saw it โ t.me prints views in full below 1,000 and to three significant figures above, so โ1,200,000 means somewhere between 1,150,000 and 1,249,999. Unmarked counts are exact. Text is reproduced from the public post preview and truncated for length.
Cite this entry
A live page changes as we take new readings, so a citation should name the measurement it is based on, not just the URL. The line below cites the subscriber count as measured 9 September 2026 โ this entry's latest reading, not the date you are reading this.
โ๐๐๐ธฦโฯฯฯัััั โก๐ท๐ฆขโ (@Ox_flora), 71 subscribers as measured 9 September 2026. Telegram Register, tgregister.com/channel/Ox_flora.
Full measurement history, CC BY 4.0. Every reading this register holds for this entry, not just the latest one, as a dated, downloadable record: CSV ยท JSON. Free to use with attribution to tgregister.com. Each file carries its own generation timestamp, which is the figure to cite for exactly when the data was retrieved.