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Сталкерские анекдоты

@stalkerhumor

On this record: Growth · Engagement · Reactions · Posts · Cite this entry

154subscribers

-2 since we began measuring on 7 August 2026

Risers and fallers across the register · movement among entries of Under 1,000.

Register entry

Telegram ID-1001614845022
TypeChannel
Username@stalkerhumor
CreatedBetween 1 December 2021 and 18 February 2022— estimated from Telegram’s id allocation, not measured. How this range is calculated.
First recorded8 August 2026
Last confirmed live23 August 2026
Measurements held4
Confirmed unchanged1 time, most recently 23 August 2026
On Telegramt.me/stalkerhumor

Growth

1541561557 August 2026 — 156 subscribers8 August 2026 — 156 subscribers15 August 2026 — 155 subscribers23 August 2026 — 154 subscribers7 August 202623 August 2026
4 measurements spanning 16 days, net -2. Dots are measurements; the straight line between them is drawn to join them, not to claim we know the path taken in between — snapshots are recorded only when a count changes, so gaps mean “no change observed”, never “interpolated”. The vertical axis spans 154–156 and does not start at zero.
Measurement log — every subscribers count we have recorded
Measured (UTC)SubscribersChange
23 Aug 2026, 09:37154-1
15 Aug 2026, 19:03155-1
8 Aug 2026, 18:17156no change
7 Aug 2026, 05:32156first reading

Engagement

19 posts held, back to 18 February 2022the reader has not yet reached the start of this channel’s public history, so older posts may sit further back, unread. Read across 1 pageof Telegram’s post history, 20 posts per page.

Nothing published in the last 30 days. ERR and ER are rolling 30-day measures, so there is nothing to compute — we hold 19 posts for this entry, the most recent from 12 January 2023. An engagement rate over an empty window would be a number about nothing.

Reaction mix

415 reactions across 19 posts, in 14 distinct kinds. The most used accounts for 35.2% of them.

Every reaction kind recorded on the sample, most used first
ReactionCountShareShare, drawn
🤣14635.2%
👍9823.6%
❤‍🔥4611.1%
317.47%
👏276.51%
😁256.02%
🔥204.82%
💘71.69%
🍌40.964%
🍓30.723%
🥰30.723%
🤪20.482%
🤯20.482%
🆒10.241%

No sentiment is inferred, and none should be read in. This table is ordered by count and by nothing else. Emoji do not carry stable meaning across languages or communities — 🙏 is thanks in one channel and mourning in another — so we publish which ones were pressed and how often, and pass no judgement on what an audience meant by them.

Precision. Telegram publishes reaction counts per emoji and short-forms each one — 4.34K, 1.2M — so any single kind at or above 1,000 reaches us at three significant figures, and only counts below 1,000 are exact. The shares above are ratios of those figures and carry the same error. This is also why the total here can differ slightly from a reaction total printed elsewhere on the page: both are sums of the same rounded parts, taken over samples with different edges.

Coverage. Reactions were read on 19 of the 19 sampled posts in this sample. Summed by Telegram’s own count on each post — not by adding up the per-emoji breakdown above — those same posts carry 415reactions in total: the kind of figure the paragraph above means by “a reaction total printed elsewhere on the page”.

Measured over the 19 most recent posts we hold, published 18 February 2022 to 12 January 2023, using the newest reading held for each. Telegram Stars are excluded: they are a payment, not a reaction, and they have their own section.

Recent posts

12 Jan 2023, 14:44 UTC≈2,370 views61 reactionsread 8 August 2026
File

File, posted without a caption

🤣50👍5🍌4💘1🆒1

12 Jan 2023, 14:44 UTC≈2,470 views60 reactionsread 8 August 2026

Вот такое знает кто?: В хлам пьяный сталкер в ТРИ часа ночи возвращается домой. Ну, а жена, значит, — со сковородкой поджидает. Сталкер на карачках ВПОЛЗ в квартиру. Достал гайку, МЕТНУЛ в сторону туалета. Повтыкал. Пополз туда. Жена это дело так молча наблюдает. Сталкер проблевался, выполз из туалета. Достал гайку, МЕТНУЛ в сторону спальни. Повтыкал. Пополз. Тут его жена со всей дури по голове. ХРЯСЬ! Сталкер. РАЗ —

🤣524👍3💘1

10 Jan 2023, 13:38 UTC≈2,310 views34 reactionsread 8 August 2026

Попал как-то сталкер на экскурсию в ад. Ему показывает черт муки, которые грешники терпят: Кипящая смола! ПЛЕТКИ! Раскаленные УГЛИ! Огонь кругоммм… Вопли. Серой воняет… Сталкер посмотрел на все это и говорит чертям: — Ну что, чуваки .Тепло у вас тут. СУХО. Эх… Да и развлечений у вас тут побольше, чем у нас, на Болотах. Так что я пожалуй… тут останусь

👏27👍51💘1

1 Apr 2022, 12:11 UTC≈2,780 views41 reactionsread 8 August 2026
Photo

Photo, posted without a caption

❤‍🔥29👍6🤣41💘1

21 Feb 2022, 22:16 UTC≈2,350 views14 reactionsread 8 August 2026
File

File, posted without a caption

👍13💘1

21 Feb 2022, 22:16 UTC≈2,460 views41 reactionsread 8 August 2026

Пробираются, значит, по улицам Припяти двое сталкеров. Один — ОПЫТНЫЙ, другой — новичок. Ну, новичок постоянно сверяется с картой… Бывалый — только ухмыляется. Тут на одном из перекрестков бывалый как ХЛОПНЕТ себя по лбу. Вырвал у новичка карту: — Точно!.. Ану давай, салага. ВОН к тому дому проберемся. Пробрались. Бывалый: — Теперь давай в этот парадняк. ЗАШЛИ. Поднялись по лестнице. Бывалый говорит: — СТОП! Ломай эт

👍30😁7🥰21💘1

20 Feb 2022, 22:59 UTC≈2,100 views3 reactionsread 8 August 2026
File

File, posted without a caption

❤‍🔥3

20 Feb 2022, 22:59 UTC≈2,150 views26 reactionsread 8 August 2026

Едут кароче на бехе па Зоне реальные пацики. Нууу, значит, типа астановились отлить. Только зажурчали — тут бааах — из-за кустов из темноты кровосос такой выскакивает и арёт: — ЗА-СА-СУУУУ!!!! Пацаны так переглянулись и спокойно гаварят: — Спасиба, канеша, братан, но мы тока с Окружной…

🔥20👍42

20 Feb 2022, 22:32 UTC≈2,000 views15 reactionsread 8 August 2026
File

File, posted without a caption

😁14👍1

20 Feb 2022, 22:32 UTC≈2,060 views30 reactionsread 8 August 2026

Заходит сталкер в Бар: — Бармен! Дай чего-нибудь пожрать. Бармен, значит, начинает: — Нуу, вот сегодня есть глаз плоти. В ТОМАТНОМ СОУСЕ. Жжареные лапки снорков. В ТОМАТНОМ СОУСЕ. Из рыбного… Щупальца кровососа. В ТОМАТНОМ СОУСЕ. Сталкера аж перекосило: — Ты, — говорит, — чего это вздумал?! ЛЮДЕЙ ТРАВИТЬ? Бармена тоже перекосило. — Кто травит!? Я? Сталкер: — А что, Я!?.. С грибным соусом давай! Какой нафиг томат?

🤣203🤪2🤯2😁2👍1

20 Feb 2022, 22:18 UTC≈1,970 views21 reactionsread 8 August 2026
Photo

Photo, posted without a caption

👍13🤣62

Showing the 12 most recent of 19 posts we hold for @stalkerhumor. View and reaction counts are the latest single reading for each post, not a live figure, and a recent post is still accumulating both. A view count marked was rounded by Telegram before we ever saw it — t.me prints views in full below 1,000 and to three significant figures above, so ≈1,200,000 means somewhere between 1,150,000 and 1,249,999. Unmarked counts are exact. Text is reproduced from the public post preview and truncated for length.

Cite this entry

A live page changes as we take new readings, so a citation should name the measurement it is based on, not just the URL. The line below cites the subscriber count as measured 23 August 2026 — this entry's latest reading, not the date you are reading this.

“Сталкерские анекдоты” (@stalkerhumor), 154 subscribers as measured 23 August 2026. Telegram Register, tgregister.com/channel/stalkerhumor.

Full measurement history, CC BY 4.0. Every reading this register holds for this entry, not just the latest one, as a dated, downloadable record: CSV · JSON. Free to use with attribution to tgregister.com. Each file carries its own generation timestamp, which is the figure to cite for exactly when the data was retrieved.